Baby Bumps In The Road

Hayden Panettiere

So as I find myself fully immersed in the throws of my third trimester of pregnancy, all the classic middle-of-the-night fears have joined in the fun too. I also couldn't help but notice Hayden Panettiere's recent admission of dealing with Postpartum depression. Thankfully this is a subject getting a lot more press these days and showing people just how real it is.

Back to Beyond - Organic Baby Clothes

With such an overwhelming amount of information out there on what to expect when you're expecting your head does start to feel VERY overloaded. The hormones and general awareness that nothing will ever be the same again have kept me up on many nights. While I am beyond excited by the little one's arrival I am also finding myself becoming a cliche of thoughts. Thoughts I honestly hadn't realised would cause me such anxiety. Questions such as "How will I really cope?, How do you get those miniature shoes on without them screaming at you?, Will I ever wash my hair again?, Will my nipples fall off?, (No I'm seriously worried that they might - apparently I'll need cabbage leaves, yes really).

Back to Beyond - Organic Baby Clothes

A few days ago I had a nasty fall, where I tackled the concrete floor like a pro Rugby player, dislocating my finger in the process. I was so high on adrenaline and mama instincts that I avoided the concrete to tummy contact with some otherworldly magic and while lying there looking at my finger at a right angle to my hand, knew I had to get the bump checked as fast as possible and my finger was just going to have to play along. I popped it out and re-set it while still lying on my back in the road... I'm not sure I would have done that a few months ago. After a trip to the maternity ward all was fine, but I was in shock at how I had responded to it all.

My bump with temporary Conscious Ink tattoo.

There has been a realisation that not only does my body no longer really belong to me, but neither it seems, does my mind. I have finally fallen in love with my body - something I NEVER thought I'd say, because here it is, despite all the crap I've fed it over the years, and verbal abuse it's had to withstand, building a human, one cell at a time, and I had nothing whatsoever to do with it... well you know what I mean. Despite all my worries and tears and angst, one bone after another has been built and now little hands and feet are currently using my internal organs as a punching bag.

So as I witness this changing vessel of a body do things I never thought I could I am also so aware of how the mind too is thinking things I never thought I would. Really strange, often totally irrelevant things. I am so aware of the potential and reality of Postpartum depression and have taken some rather drastic steps recently to get myself into a physical place where I am as supported and as safe as I can be. Because it's all very very real. And while I never thought I'd be popping back dislocated digits like it was a loose strand of hair - I also have no idea what's around this very large corner. All I can say is that with the support I have now surrounded myself with in the last few weeks, and making sure that I keep that communication open I hope that this next chapter will be the joy it's meant to be.

Back to Beyond - Organic Baby Clothes

But as my final note, you don't need a bump and hormones to relate to this. Because all of us are struggling with something. By bringing an awareness to it, whether it be financial concerns, or a difficult working environment, and trying to be as open as we can be with those we trust and love can and does ease so much of the crazy. And we all need a lot less of the crazy in our lives, and so much more of the ahhhh.

So next time someone asks how you are, you don't have to use them as a therapist, but get a little more real. Be a little more honest.

And ask for help if you need it. (And yes, I'm still learning that new lesson)

x Jo

Some Images provided by Back To Beyond - original, made to order, beautiful, Organic baby clothes.

www.backtobeyond.com

I see the sea - and everything else.

It's a wet Fall day here, and my thoughts are turning to my studio that is waiting for some attention and creativity to make it feel wanted again. And as I began to think about new artistic inspiration and the summer that I've just said goodbye to I remembered this film from a few years ago.

It reminded me also of a walk I took along the beach a few weeks ago. As the last of the tourists began to leave the sand, I walked and swam in the changing tides. And I also filled an entire bag with plastic. Creatively I have for some time been inspired by turning the unwanted into something beautiful and this film shows just how beautiful that transformation can be.

By the time I had ended my walk, the bag was bulging and the idea that I could empty it all back onto the sand seemed insane, but only moments before I had walked past it watching it blend in with the seaweed and tried to ignore it. But I was aware too that all it takes to make (even a small) difference in this world is to take a bag, 'out there' and do our part. It's not someone else's job. It's ours.

Before we started Mindful Apparel I must admit I wasn't one for Organic soap, hemp oil or a wheatgrass shot. I got my t-shirts at the big, low cost, wear-em-till-they-drop shops. But now that most of my wardrobe consists of past samples, current samples and hopefully future ones from our line, my attitude has changed. I still use the other stores occasionally of course, but now my beloved bamboo scarf (as seen below) and my organic tee's are now so over loved and over used, that the difference is obvious. Not only do they really let my skin 'breathe', (something my mother used to say when I was younger and now I know what she's talking about), but there's a feeling that I get when I wear them, that I am somehow making a small difference.

View fullsize

Hypo-alregenic, Bamboo, scarf. "Thoughts are Things". $29.00

I think that the changes we make don't always have to be grand or extreme but sometimes just being mindful of our environment and what we surround ourselves is at least something.

This year not only do we still have our 100% organic cotton range but we are using more of the Eco-hybrid fabric, which feels incredible and and falls beautifully on the body. These new cutting edge fabrics are hypoallergenic and with our Eco-Heather range were produced from re-cycled materials. The rest of our new line will be out shortly and I am particularly excited about our new cardigan wrap ( and yes I've already got my eye on the sample).

Both Carrie and I find that the more we make an effort to mindfully source our products and introduce new items the more important it becomes to us to do so. They are not always easy to find and often hugely expensive, so we hope to solve both these issues for you!

We really hope you all like the upcoming products and as always we would love to hear feedback on what you like about them and what you would like to see us offer in the future. 

But for now, if your Saturday is looking a little wet, make yourself a coffee, wrap up and spend the next 24 minutes watching this truly beautiful film that might inspire you take a bag on your next walk in nature.

X Jo